I don’t feel like seeing my boyfriend for the day…
I had a dream I was madly deeply and crazy in love for a girl, but she didn’t want me back.
I’m tired of carrying on under these false pretenses.
I’m too tired to keep smiling,
I’m too tired to pretend to care about what happens around me,
I’m too tired to keep up with people,
I’m too tired to do well in my classes,
I’m too tired to play the role of excellent daughter, student, girlfriend.
I’m just tired of everything.
I don’t want to keep trying.
I just want to power down and sleep.
I want to forget everything outside of my mind and inside my thoughts.
I don’t want to dream, and I don’t want to think.
I don’t think I want to die, but I’m too tired to live.
I just want to sleep.
And even now, it’s so hard to let myself cry.
Why is it I think my tears on the ground are a waste?